I married a technological savant.
This is a great situation for me because that way I don't have to worry about stuff working. If my computer goes down, I just stomp around shouting, "GOD! I HATE this thing! Stupid computer! Argh!" (and we wonder why Laurel does that) until it gets fixed. Which it does. Immediately.
I've become shamefully dependent on Greg for this knowledge, and therefore have become pretty helpless when it comes to what we have. Our basement is a complete mystery to me. We have tangles of wires running hither and yon through our floor joists. Greg's desk has at least three monitors on it right now, and computer parts are strewn across the floor like Ethan's toys. When I open the door to peer down the basement steps, I'm assaulted by the persistent hum of the servers kept in the storm shelter, which I swear are multiplying at night while we're asleep. I'm certain they're plotting against us.
Anyway, Greg's debit card keeps malfunctioning on him. In the few years we have had an account at our credit union, I have had one card. Greg has gone through two and is desperately in need of number three, though I can guarantee that I swipe my card more than he uses his. His has stopped working much of the time, and he is SO ANGRY at Lowes right now because "THEIR STUPID self checkout card readers NEVER WORK, they NEVER TAKE MY CARD and the CASHIER IS SO UNHELPFUL, she just GAVE UP the other day and WALKED AWAY to watch a husband yell at his wife."
Whew. This is serious business.
My opinion is that the multiplying servers downstairs are creating such a powerful electromagnetic field that his card is slowly just being erased. Over time, they're sucking the life out of his credit card. They're probably using the information gathered as part of their takeover plot. Now, I'm not usually a conspiracy theorist, but this time I think all the evidence points toward my theory as the truth.
So I guess I'll have to call the credit union again and request another card for Greg again and they'll deactivate the one he already has, rendering it even more useless than it is right now. And poor Greg will be without his debit card while waiting a week for another.
It's those damn computers, I tell you. And they're listening in as I type.