Ethan is afflicted with pinkeye.
He's also taken to unzipping his pajamas just enough to pay homage to The King.
They ('they' being the doctor's office) tell me that I am to apply a warm compress to Ethan's eye for five minutes prior to administering eye drops. Yeah. Right. Anybody who thinks it possible to hold a rambunctious toddler still for five minutes is clearly slobber-on-themselves deranged.