Monthly Archives: November 2006

Laurel-isms, Part V

We have a lot today because it's a snow day.  Yay.

 Me:  "Laurel, if you put that paper towel on top of your freshly watercolored painting, it may smear it because the paper towel will wick up the paint."

 Laurel:  "Nonsense."    (lifts paper towel)   "See?  It's the same as it ever was."



Calgon, take me away.

Dinner Conversations.

Seven Going on Fifteen

Greg:  "Laurel, do you know what today is?"

Laurel:  "What?"

Greg:  "The day before the day before the day before my birthday."

Laurel:  "Knock it off."

Table Manners:

Greg:  "Laurel, don't use your finger to clean your plate, that's using bad manners."

Me:  "…he says with his elbows on the table."

Laurel:  "Ethan has his elbows on the table."

Greg:  "Ethan doesn't know what elbows are."

Lights, Camera, But Not So Much Action.

The Family Christmas Display is almost complete.  However, Greg  (a/k/a Clark Griswold) tripped a breaker last night with all the lights, and they're not all up anyway (some are still on order in fact), so everyone will just have to wait a few days for the Great Unveiling.   

Laurel-isms, Part III

Me:  "The weather is so beautiful, I think Daddy's going to grill burgers tonight."

Laurel:  "YAY!  I love Daddy's grilled hamburgers the best!  They have an ingredient that nobody else's burgers have."

Me:  "Oh, yeah?  And what is that?"

Laurel:  "Love.  Lots of love.  You know those little bumps and ridges that are on the hamburger patties that Daddy makes?"

Me:  "Yes."

Laurel:  "That's where the love is."

Dollar Words.

Laurel's gifted teachers gave the kids an assignment to see how many dollar words they could find.  Dollar words are words in which each letter is assigned an amount of money (a = $0.01, b = $0.02, c=$0.03, . . . z = $0.26), and when adding the value of all letters, it equals $1.00.  So far, Laurel has found two — 'clockwise' and 'Wednesday.' 

But that wasn't enough for Greg.

No, Greg had to go and write a program to figure the value of the words in a database of 354,000 words and then print the dollar words to a list.  He has come up with 3,578 dollar words from that list.  By extrapolation (which is worth $1.70) , it appears that about 1% of the words in the English language are dollar words.  We DID make Laurel find her own words, but we're going to send Greg's list to school — because she gets a piece of candy for each dollar word she finds.  Ha!

Me:  "That's just cheating, Greg."

Greg:  "That's not cheating.  That's using your resources."

Here are some of the words worth $1.00:  acenaphthene, agrypniai, besmircher, boondoggled, cacophonical, cousins, disparageable, emasculate, gobbledegook.  I vote we send Laurel to school with the word 'emasculate' as a dollar word.

Here is the word in that particular database with the highest value:  hydroxydesoxycorticosterone, which is a $3.90 word.  'Oversuperstitiousness' (the first reasonable word with a high value) is worth $3.28.

That's what we're about – playing fast and loose with the rules of life.


Toddler Eye Candy

Here is Ethan's new spill-proof straw cup, featuring Dora, that Spanish-speaking floozy, in a rather brief swimsuit:

Nothing like getting little boys started early, right?  Sigh.